Every parent wants more and better for their children than what they had growing up. Either financially, making sure they have more options, and/or make better choices. But do we ever impose our own dreams on our kids? And if so, is that a bad thing? The many scenarios that this could have will probably play a part in whether it’s looked at as good or bad.
I grew up in a household where academic achievement was highly stressed, and as a result (at least I think it played a part) I went through school with pretty good grades. Even managed to graduate from college with honors, and that was while simultaneously raising 2 boys at the time. I now find myself putting that same academic emphasis on my boys. It also so happens that they’re pretty much straight A students (the occasional B here and there).
Queue my husband – he’s more athletically inclined, and also used to coach high school football. His dream for his kids is that they one day play professional sports. But in the meantime and between time, his emphasis is simply that they play good enough to get a scholarship. Beyond a career, he pushes sports as a means for the kids to stay active and get off their electronic devices, which I can’t argue with.
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I will say that we’re both very aware that the kids should follow and pursue their own dreams. But children like to make their parents proud and so they see the passion in our eyes when we discuss what we like, though they’re very aware that they’re free to do as they please. This causes them to try their best at the things we care about. With sports, not everyone is naturally inclined, but my husband will tell you it’s just finding the right sport. My two oldest are 12 and 14, and they’ve done football, soccer, and baseball. Baseball was deemed the most promising talent wise, and so that’s what’s currently being pursued. In addition to those grades of course, lol.
Neither one of us want anything bad for our children, but we’re simply showing two different ways for the kids to be presented with more options as they get older. At least that’s what we tell ourselves, lol. I’m curious though, are we doing the right thing?
College or No College?
I’ve of course also been a firm believer that a college degree is non-negotiable. It’s happening! Period. But in today’s society, I see 20-somethings starting their own business and making it! I know that with the technology we have today and a couple of good connections, the world is your oyster and a degree is no longer a guarantee for success. So now I find myself pushing it for the “experience”, lol. Should I be pushing it at all though?
How do you balance your dreams for your kids and your kids’ own dreams?